By Sarah Freeman
Notoriously one of the hottest street fests of the year—for both the eye candy and the temps—Northalsted Market Days takes over more than six blocks in Boystown this weekend for its big 3-0 birthday. Massive crowds have helped the wet and wild fest earn a reputation as the largest two-day fair in the Midwest, and with a birthday coming up, it’s sure to be a spectacle among spectacles. Avoid the stress of Market Days while navigating stages and booths among the hundreds of thousands of sticky bodies with a few tips and suggestions of highlights not to miss.
LISTEN
Nearly 40 acts occupy three stages throughout the fest, including some whose stardoms date back further than the festival’s birth more than 30 years ago. In addition to local bands and divas in drag, two can’t-miss stars bookend the fest—and the era in which it has spanned.
Something new
Darren Criss, North Stage, 4:30-5:45 p.m. Saturday
Calling all Gleeks! The “Glee” breakout cutie, aka Blaine Anderson, brings his boyish charms to the gayborhood for a sure-to-be-mob-scene of frenzied fans.
Something old
Ms. Gloria Gaynor, North Stage, 8:30-9:45 p.m. Sunday
We’d hesitate to suggest this disco icon is in any way “old,” but it’s fair to say she was “surviving” well before the Beyonces of the world. Break out the glitter and disco ball bras for this one.
DO
Boasting crows of more than 300,000, Market Days can terrify even the most fearless, least claustrophobic festival-goer. While it’s a bit overly ambitious to experience it all, it’s highly encouraged to mark these down on your to-do list.
Must-do
Go shirtless, people-watch
Don’t expect the wet forecast to stop attendees from maintaining the tradition of walking around Halsted Street shirtless. There are only a few weeks left to show off bathing suit bods, so enjoy the tanned and toned Chicagoans while you can—and consider participating yourself.
Should-do
Collect freebies, pass GO
Snag deals for swag by following @northalsted on Twitter. The neighborhood’s business association tweets special discounts and happenings throughout the weekend.
EAT
Between checking out the half-naked hotties and checking in at the more than 400 booths, you are bound to work up an appetite. Quiet those hunger pangs at these standout spots.
Carnivores
The Hearty Boys
Anyone can make a cheeseburger, but leave it to The Hearty Boys to up the ante on catering with their decadent blue-cheese burgers. If you prefer surf instead of turf, try the lobster rolls.
Herbivores
Yoshi’s Cafe, Chicago Diner
Fear not, vegetarians—you won’t go hungry. Yoshi’s Café grills Portobello mushroom sandwiches and Boystown’s vegetarian pride and joy, Chicago Diner, serves up vegetarian hot dogs.
SARAH FREEMAN IS A METROMIX SPECIAL CONTRIBUTOR. METROMIX@TRIBUNE.COM | @METROMIXCHI
Read more: Tips for straight dudes at Market Days